I have changed. I used to be a worry-pot. I used to get annoyed at the slightest thing. I could get in a real temper. But that was before Mom became ill and died. It was a life-changing event. I wish I could bring her back. I still miss her every day. But her illness, and her death at no age at all, made me see that some things just aren’t worth worrying about.

I will always be a stickler for detail, for getting things right. But I am much more in tune with the natural rhythm of life now. The usual up’s and down’s come and go, and I am calm. Mom’s illness showed me how to get the best out of life, out of other people, and out of myself.

When faced with an awful family drama, I had no choice but to go along with the disease process, to give myself up to it, and to be there for Mom, no matter what. Nothing in my life at the moment presents as much fear as Mom’s illness did. Somehow, I found the strength to cope with that.

Have faith and confidence in your inner strength. Deal with the difficult stuff, but don’t sweat the small stuff.

Living with Mom’s cancer

  

Lesley

I am a scientist and a blogger. I have a PhD in the genetics of cardiovascular risk. My Mom died of cancer last year. We learnt a lot and met some amazing people. I want to share with others how to live positively with cancer, and make choices in end-of-life care. My top tip: Ask the difficult questions.

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