talkhealth Blog

Apologies for the boring blog post title…my social media ‘guru’ other half said that I had to use it, as people looking for weight loss stories would use those words! Argh – he has also been filling my mind with ‘keywords’ and ‘SEO’ all afternoon…all I want to do is eat French Fries and my Brinner (short for – breakfast dinner!)

I am not one for creating blog posts for the masses and his advice makes me want to tear my hair out! His job is PR though and he does know what he is talking about – but shush! I don’t want him knowing that I said that. I am just happy bimbling along writing about my daily mission of shifting this weight…so that is what I will continue to do!

Right then. Mini moan over. My weigh in was this morning and I was a little apprehensive about group if truth be told. My exercise levels have been almost non-existent this past few weeks – firstly due to my stress fractured foot…now due to my poorly treadmill. I needed 1lb to get my 15st award and had an inkling that Sods Law might intervene this week. However, the diet fairies must have worked their magic last night as I lost 3.5lbs to give me my 15st award and a total loss so far of 15st 2.5lbs. To say that I was happy is an understatement!

Today’s haul from group looked like this…

Woman of the Year 2013 for my group – I was thrilled! I got the lovely flowers and a free week certificate (it would have been a bottle of wine…but my consultant knows that I don’t drink!) and I got the opportunity to talk in group about my journey. Not that they can shut me up nowadays!

The thing that I loved most about group today was the look on the new members faces when they saw my before pictures. I had put together a little montage of pictures – I had actually lost at least 2st already in them! – and there were gasps of shock when they saw them. Partly at my size when I first started this journey, but I like to think mostly at the difference with current reality!

I am not sharing these pictures online yet, as I am still very emosh about them. If they got into the wrong hands I would be devastated. I do have progress pictures and I promise that I will share them one day. Maybe people think that I am not real if I don’t share my pictures…but rest assured that I am very real and I am still more than a handful! Well, my bum is…my boobs are quite small which is a bugger!

So, back to the group. My consultant was – as always – excellent and asked the group to respect my confidences. The only reason that I have shared my starting weight with them is because I feel comfortable enough to do so, and she has made this environment possible. We discussed what my life was like back then – the panic attacks, the daily struggle, my worry over dying, being told that surgery was my only option. She also remembered how I took my Mum and my other half with me for support and as a comfort blanket on my first night!

And then there was my method of getting to class. I would arrive really early – to get weighed on the special scales from head office (for those of you contemplating Slimming World…don’t worry, the scales will weigh people up to 39st) – and I would park as close as I could to the front door. I would then walk – well shuffle – and have to sit down straight away as I was so out of breath and in pain from walking the short distance into group. My other half would pay for me and I would catch my breath before getting on the scales. If my consultant wanted to chat to me, I had to sit down whilst she did so, as I couldn’t stand up for more than a few seconds at a time.

Wow – writing that brings it all back. I just cannot get to grips with the fact that this was my life last year. The difference – even though I still weigh 28st+ – is seriously amazing. I can park wherever I want to in the car park, walk in, queue up, I handle the signing in desk – which I would never have done at my biggest…I just wanted to hide away – and I can stroll out of group without a worry now. I can go to sleep at night without worrying that I won’t wake up in the morning. I can walk to see my niece and nephew without looking as if I need a paramedic when I arrive at their door…the list is endless, and I can only imagine what my life will be like at target!

It was actually really quite emotional. My Mum was with me as she had taken me because Freddie Freelander is having a garage visit. The one thing that really got to me was the support I have had – and I include all of my Facbook and Twitter friends in that support group too – but my Mum and my family have been amazing. Without them, I would have been buggered. So I got a bit emotional when the pictures were passed around and when my consultant asked my Mum if she could recall me being that size. I was just so upset that I had put everyone through that. You cannot do it for anyone else though – no matter how much they want it for you, and how much pressure they put you under – you have to do it for you…and my family know that; I just wish that I could have sorted myself out sooner. However, I have done it, I am on the right path and I know that I am making them proud – if their text messages today are anything to go by!

That nice 15st award was mine, I had my Woman of the Year certificate – with flowers and my free week certificate – and then I was told that I was also Slimmer of the Week…that nearly did me in! So I came away loaded up with goodies – but loaded up with a heart full of love for everyone who has shown me support along the way.

I don’t want to say, “If I can do it, anyone can.” Why? Because all of us are different. We gain weight for different reasons, we have different reasons for losing it, different triggers, different vices, different goals, different ways of shedding our excess weight. Yet I will say that my life is a world away from what it was – my food is so different…out went the takeaways and in came home cooking, and neither me or my other half are Jamie Oliver’s! My attitude to exercise has changed – if I was exercising for weight loss then I would clearly throw in the towel…I have lost half a stone in the past two weeks without shifting…but I do it for my health – both physical and mental. My approach to my weight loss has also changed – it is less about the numbers and more about the feeling…so much so that I had to check my book before inputting my weight in my online Slimming World tracker, as I hadn’t even looked at the scales (I am 28st 3lbs now!). So life is different all round…I am far from perfect and never will be – I wouldn’t want to be either…but life is just better and I feel good.

I recorded a little YouTube video that you can have a look at here if you want too…just my ramblings about the morning in group!

Right then, now that little speech is over, I will update you on the rest of the days antics…

That dog was incredibly irritating again last night. I had headed to bed early and it started barking at 10.30pm just as I was getting off to sleep. It then had another round about 11.15pm and again at 11.55pm. I am not usually the complaining type when it comes to neighbours – but I really do feel that I either have to complain in a rational frame of mind one day, or I will end up storming around there in my pyjamas and will throw a tantrum of epic proportions! So once the dog had finally decided to shut up, I managed to get to sleep but did not want to get up at 7am…although I did, as my other half kind of rolled me out of bed. I grabbed a shower and beautified myself as I knew that a picture would be taken in group today – when I say ‘beautified’ what I meant was that I had a shower and straightened my wild hair…and put the tiniest amount of mascara on with a bit of Burts Bees lip balm! I then did a little project work before my Mum arrived to escort me to group. Then it was the delights that you have already read about, followed by a trip to the horses and Asda. Mum and I arrived at the stables to find that my other half forgot to turn the tap off yesterday…so the yard has been well watered. I got out of the car and my flip flops sunk into the muddy boggy water…I am sure that he heard me cursing him from three miles away! Once we had been to Asda, I had lunch, settled down to check emails and do my weigh in day updates – and was once again totally overwhelmed and blown away by the messages of support. Seriously, it is amazing and humbling and a little bit embarrassing all at the same time. The fact that I am saving my life is enough for me and so all of these wonderful messages get me a bit bashful at times – and I am not normally the bashful type! I am looking forward to a less emotional evening with a bit of Jack Bauer thrown in I think.

Breakfast: Banana.

Lunch: Two tandoori chicken pittas with salad (2 x HEB).

Dinner: Cooked breakfast (2 syns and 2 x HEA).

Snacks: French Fries (24 syns).

My food has been immense today! I usually love a Green day after group, but I fancied kebab type something or others and found some tandoori chicken mini fillets in Asda which were syn free and so handy for a time-stretched day. So I used these in HEB pittas and stuffed them with salad too. Dinner was gorgeous…I don’t think there is anything as good as scrambled egg with LowLow in it – proper comfort food. I had my usual combo of spinach, onion, tomato and mushrooms as my superfree, with bacon and Weight Watchers sausages – it was so good. My snacks were my usual crisp-fest…which I haven’t actually eaten yet…but will likely do so!

Exercise: Nothing exercised today apart from my emotions!

Thank you so much for reading – I hope that you have a wonderful week and that my fellow losers get the results that you deserve this week,

Weight Loss Bitch xxx

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WeightLossBitch

On a health and fitness driven journey to lose over 32st / 448lbs / 203kgs – yes, it is a considerable amount – I am committed to losing my excess weight without the aid of weight loss surgery, diet pills, or quick fixes…as there aren’t any! Changing my eating habits and building up my fitness levels, along with addressing the ‘head issues’ will be crucial in order for me to achieve my goal. Living in England as a 31 year old super morbidly obese woman can be challenging to say the least. I have been shouted at in the street and verbally abused far too many times to mention; hence the name ‘Weight Loss Bitch’…the day I am just called a ‘bitch’ instead of a ‘fat bitch’ will be the day that I know I have cracked my weight loss! With many reasons to lose this weight I am documenting my journey for a number of reasons. Firstly, I would like to keep a record of the ups and downs, the highs and lows, and the challenges I face with such an enormous task to tackle. Secondly, I would also like to inspire and encourage other people who are in a similar situation and to show them that significant amounts of weight can be lost naturally…with a bit of motivation, hard work, dedication and will power. Thirdly, all of the blogging, Facebook-ing, Tweet-ing, Pinterest-ing and YouTube-ing keeps me occupied and keeps my fingers out of the fridge!