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1Nov

“Be slow to fall into friendship but when thou art in continue firm and constant”- Socrates.

Gosh can you all believe it? It’s November already, where has the year gone? It’s absolutely flown!

Unfortunately this year cannot pass by quick enough for some family health problems have upset us and challenged us however I remain optimistic and know that love will shine through and that in times of sorrow the family unite and reveal how strong a unit we really are.

Three words will come out of tonight’s post the one’s that are of the greatest importance those are:

Epilepsy Awareness Month.

November is not only a time of bonfires, warmer clothing and chilling on the sofa with your nearest and dearest it’s a month where we show our appreciation to everyone who is effected by Epilepsy. Whether it be the sufferer or the person witnessing the suffering we form a unity that cannot be broken. That in itself is something I am extremely proud to say I’m a part of and I thank you all for welcoming me into your community some ten months ago.

I’ll let you in on a little secret.

Prior to blogging and explaining my Epilepsy journey I was a person who was in denial with my Epilepsy.

I would drop it into conversation and try to enhance people’s confidence who had the same condition however I was very negative about Epilepsy because in my eyes all it brought was turmoil. I hid behind my condition and was ashamed.

Like a tornado Epilepsy reeked havoc on everyone who was in it’s path including my family and that in itself was something that I didn’t particularly enjoy. In fact for a significant amount of years I blamed myself for putting this in my family’s direction.

When I made the decision to write Sazzle’s blog I never anticipated the response it would get.

My followers are some of the nicest people I’ve spoken to. They are incredibly funny and have made me see that everyone is on a journey of some description. Chatting to you all brings a smile to my face because I know you all have your personal journeys that you are battling through to which you have allowed me to be part of your life as I have a part of mine.

I’ve formed friendships with life long advocates who channel this condition in the right way. I never for one second thought I would be deemed as an Epilepsy advocate to you all. To me I was a person with a story.

Knowing that there are others out there who although suffer different severities of the condition to mine can associate with my thought process and side effects like no other.

Epilepsy is something that affects us all. Husbands, wives, partners, mothers, fathers, grandparents, step-parents, friends, colleagues and everyone in between. It’s safe to say the majority of people you will speak to within your lifetime will know or have known someone with Epilepsy. Whether that be someone in the street convulsing or a family friend sitting unresponsive in the corner there will be that person in the back of your mind with our condition.

The patience of those very people in my eyes is something that keeps people like me going.

Those very people I’ve named are sometimes the forgotten people however without them maybe the way we perceive our condition may be a lot different because the battle would be so much greater.

Whether you have a condition or not each and every one of you has given me the strength to be proud to say that I suffer from Epilepsy and although I don’t necessarily enjoy having it that I have people like yourself who have willed me on and made me see that I needed to at times seek additional support. This in itself has given me the power to want to change my shortcomings and be satisfied with who I am.

When people mention the word Epilepsy people either do one of three things. Listen, disregard or advise.

Disregarding just one in 65 million people is like sticking two fingers up to someone you’ve just pissed off and walking away. This doesn’t help the person it just pisses them off even more, in fact it doesn’t accomplish anything.

People don’t disregard others who suffer from more well known conditions therefore why turn us away? Is it because people are scared we will have a seizure in front of them or is it something greater?

What needs to be raised is that people suffering from Epilepsy never asked for this suffering. We just want to be treat like everyone else. Normality is an issue that someone such as myself has tried for so long to have.

Although I’m not convulsing on a daily basis the shaking episodes themselves have already posed a concern to me resulting in me not being able to accomplish my goals for that day thus stressing me in extreme cases to no return. Epilepsy is still a massive part of my life and I know this won’t go away in a hurry.

To everyone else they see me as a young(ish) woman who goes to work, supports the family and buys the occasional lavish item for herself. Fortunately on the outside that is what I am.

On the inside I am a young(ish) woman suffering from a condition out of her control occasionally hiding the worry behind the smile and cracking the odd joke to alleviate the pressures of what Epilepsy can bring. This has changed recently however it will take time to accomplish.

Ever since I was younger my gran used the saying “Patience is a virtue” and come to think of it I’ve had to have all the patience in the world. Her saying couldn’t be as prominent as it is right now. Irrespective of what issues you have we all have a voice and that voice should be heard.

As for the remainder of the day. Let’s summarise:

Payday! Get in there! Shopping with my mother was on this evening’s agenda. After scoring for treble advantage points in UK based store Boots I had the pleasure of picking up a FREE (yes you heard it right) FREE purple eyeshadow to celebrate Epilepsy awareness month.

As for the food well it’s going rather well.. apart from my morning twirl. To allow myself to a little piece of chocolate tends to keep me on track than removing it entirely from my diet therefore this shall stay for the time being.

Exercise was completed yesterday. My legs are well and truly burning!

Family- As fabulous as ever!

To conclude today’s post. Here it is, Epilepsy awareness month! Be patient with the condition you have because you and Epilepsy may have to accept one another some day.

This may be a long, slow and gruelling process however I have belief in you as you have in me therefore let’s do this together. Massive hugs and thanks go to the support networks we have who give us the confidence to want that normality on our happier days. As for the rest of you thank you all for reading this evening’s post. I look forward to speaking to you and writing many more.

  

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