First of all I have to say a huge ‘thank you’ to you! Your support and love is amazing and I really do find it overwhelming and refreshing to know that there are lovely people out there…people who can see past the weight and just offer a kind word…it really spurs me on!
The highs of yesterday are still lingering and I sashayed (okay, limped) around the gym today and enjoyed another decent workout. My other half is on his new lighter programme which focuses him on certain areas every few days – rather than an all over workout each day. I will build myself up to that, but at the moment I am just enjoying feeling my muscles ache…strange, but true!
As an aside, my other half asked a personal trainer for help today and the advice conflicted with what he had been told the other day. It is so hard to find someone that you trust and believe in…I later heard this chap telling a group of ladies how one of his clients has gone from a size 26 down to a size 18 in less than a month with his help. I wondered if she had dysentery rather than training sessions. I am sure that his intentions are genuine…but I was smelling a whiff of bullshit! My ‘big headed twat’ radar started pinging…so I am going to lurk around in the background whilst my other half has the free taster session he was arm-twisted into.
Despite being a monumental fatty for so long, I have had personal trainers in the past and know some very credible people…and what this chap was spouting was not ringing true. Watch this space as we – well, my other half – is training with this guy tomorrow. I am dying to ask if he has a time and date stamped before and after picture of this lady he mentioned…but that would be cruel!
Anyway, whilst I was on the cross trainer, with my other half next to me, I started thinking about a programme I had watched the other night. It was on Channel 5 and showed how relationships had broken down when one half of the couple had dramatically lost weight. The lady at the start of the show had lost her hubby…he had an affair with a lady who was larger. One chap ditched his partner as his sole focus seemed to be on achieving perfection – whatever the feck perfection looks like…I think he will be searching for a long time! One lady ditched her chap as she couldn’t face ever getting fat again. And then one relationship was quite hard to fathom. The chap seemed to be trying, but the lady seemed to be finding reasons not to make it work…it was a tough one.
It made me wonder how strong the relationships were to begin with. My other half is incredibly supportive and is really on board with me losing my weight. He met me when I was big, loves me, but is happy to see me getting healthy. I am hoping that we have a long and happy relationship together with lots of fun stuff to look forward to.
I often get messages asking if he is supportive. The general feeling and responses I get are that partners can be difficult. I am told that their partners prefer them larger, or aren’t at all supportive. For me, if my partner preferred me so overweight that my health was suffering, there would be a packed bag by the front door – seriously…if you love someone then you must want to see them happy and healthy…anything but this is incredibly dysfunctional. I am not saying to ditch your other half if they aren’t supportive, but maybe try and work out why they feel this way – it can often stem from insecurity. However, as I am no psychologist, I will leave that difficult topic alone.
I think that it is important to focus on yourself, but bring other people along for the ride. I try and involve my other half, yet I don’t push him to eat like me for example. One of the common issues I hear about is how hard people find it when their partners and family eat different food…it is hard to resist. But that is his food…not mine! I work hard to tell myself that I am eating the food I eat for a reason – the fact that it tastes good is a bonus – but the fact that it has helped me lose over 17st is bloody fantastic. So all of those moments that I have had, wishing I could eat what my other half was eating, pale into insignificance each time I get a weight loss award.
We joined the gym together and I gently encourage healthy eating. However his post-workout lunch was a McDonalds…mine was celeriac soup a couple of hours later…so I sat, hungry, whilst him and my nephew had their McDonalds. Whilst I encourage healthy eating, I would never deny someone what they wanted. My nephew has a healthy diet and some fries and fish fingers once in a while won’t hurt him…or my other half. It would however be difficult for me to justify having a McDonalds. For me, this is food that won’t help me reach my goal…and let’s face it, I eat enough of the bloody Asda meat free burgers to keep a small country happy, so I really don’t need a ‘treat’ from a fast-food outlet! I am trying to move away from food treats…dogs get treats!
I guess what I am trying to say in a long-winded way is that you can survive and make changes whilst your family don’t necessarily follow your lead. It can be a little harder, but once you have resisted a few times, it gets easier. You need to focus on you.
The programme was interesting – it highlighted that the Cinderella ending we might hope for with weight loss is not all that it is cracked up to be. It ended with the words, “How much are you prepared to lose?”…I wasn’t put off losing weight by this in the slightest…I am prepared to lose what I need to in order to gain the life that I want – one full of activity, health and time spent with loved ones.
Other than my musings – and chatting with my other half about how he feels about our future – today has been spent watching Peppa Pig and doing some drawings with my nephew. There was a moment in the gym when my healthy living reputation was thrown in jeopardy…my other half dropped his tobacco tin on the floor – and filling your lungs full of smoke after a workout is not good. I then collected my nephew from the crèche and he looked at me and said, “McDonalds?”…so that was it, I was in the gym bad-books. The two men in my life today let me down big style! I also went to check on the horses and to fix the electric fencing. Some plonker had blocked the driveway though and so I had to lug the battery down the road and across the field, in the rain…and up a hill – it was another good workout though.
My food has been tasty today. Brekkie was nice and filling – my porridge sachet of plain oats made with water, a chopped banana and a couple of plums. Lunch was the celeriac soup recipe I posted the other day on my Facebook page – I have to say that it was delicious, and my other half had some for his dinner and said that it was the best soup he had ever tasted! Dinner was quick and simple – a tub of stir-fry veggies with added onion and mushroom, chopped Linda Mc sausages, and a packet of curry rice from the Batchelors range…syn free, full of superfree, quick and tasty. I decided on some plain rice cakes for my snack tonight – 1.5 syns each – and they were good.
Exercise: 30 minutes cross trainer and 40 minutes weights.
Thank you for reading,
Weight Loss Bitch xxx