talkhealth Blog

“You don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our paths for a reason”- Unknown.

Right well I think this quote has pretty much summed up today’s entire blog post in one sentence. Need I continue?

I think today is truly about acceptance and coming to terms with who we are and represent.

Many of you reading this will think to yourselves that I have covered this topic on more than one occasion however I feel that if I keep on saying certain things regularly that these words will eventually sink in and make you see how much you’re loved.

Let’s just say the shit we were once prepared to put up with is deemed as a distant memory because priorities change, events happen that are out of our control and we start to notice that we’re growing into ourselves that bit more. Instead of playing second fiddle to everyone else’s life it’s about stepping up and taking control of your own. Leave negativity where it ought to be, At the door.

Since writing Sazzle’s blog I’ve been given the opportunity to speak with all of you who have given me that second chance and have made me accept the condition I so longed to do. The people I’ve had the pleasure to speak to have made me see that Epilepsy shouldn’t be a burden it’s a part of me therefore I need to try to cope in a different way to what I once did and to incorporate positivity into my life.

Epilepsy to me was a condition that I never fully understood. I didn’t mind exchanging thoughts with people who asked about it however whenever discussed had that wishy washy feeling of how can I change this?

What can I do to make myself accept who I am? To this day I care about what I was diagnosed with however cannot keep crying over a condition that has been with me for the majority of my life therefore I made a lifelong choice to identify trends and to seek help. Instead of wallowing in self pity change was needed therefore I sought additional support, contacted Epilepsy support groups, started writing and receiving advice from all of you.

The path I once chose was one that would lead to destruction and would result in me feeling down and not feeling worthy. After a seizure closing that door would feel like I was closing a chapter in my life however it was completely the opposite because I wasn’t facing with what I had. It was like a ticking time bomb waiting for the next episode to happen and hoping it would be less severe than the last.

At one stage I was sick of crying worrying frequently about the seizures, the shakes and all the side effects in between. As much as Epilepsy isn’t my favourite appetiser there’s nothing I can do to prevent it other than change my attitude towards it and go down an alternative route a one of happiness, hope and pride because as you are all aware an episode can dent our pride therefore when do we stop allowing it to?

A question for you.

Can we ever prevent Epilepsy from causing damage? The answer to that I hope is yes. I say this because after seeing the strength in all of you it’s plain to see that we unanimous in our quest for a cure fighting this condition together, supporting one another in ways we deemed impossible.

I have been informed by many of you that St Valentine was the patron saint of Epilepsy therefore it’s only right (albeit it a little late) to say a very Happy valentines day and pass my love onto the 65 million people along with their families on this day. There’s no such thing as losing therefore let’s keep going.

On a lighter note..

Talking about Valentine’s day well.. I have to be honest I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s day. Each to their own I say.

You can tell Valentines day’s coming because come 2nd January all card retailers get out their banners, their cards, presents etc and start preparing for Valentine’s day celebrations in which people feel obliged to spend an arm and a leg on their partner to show them how much they love them.

For people who don’t get a valentine’s day card or present tend to take the huff and then the big argument comes along as to how much they’re valued and whether their relationship will stand the test of time. I’ve seen this happen in the past hell I think when I was about fifteen I was one of them. How childish eh?

Now I can’t help but say this but I think it’s a big con if I’m brutally honest. I’m a sucker for romance don’t get me wrong. Ranging from Mr Darcy coming out the lake in Pride & Prejudice to Bridget eventually getting her man in Bridget Jones Diary it’s all good. I adore my period dramas and will for a happy ending however I cannot be arsed with the whole valentine’s affair.

Maybe it was because the following happened growing up. I know this is going to come out wrong so apologises in advance..

Now I’m not saying I’m the most attractive or popular person far from it however growing up the couple of boys I was in relationship with felt the urge to buy me a box of Milk tray chocolates on valentines day. You can tell they were from the year before because they had dust on them due to them sitting in a warehouse from the year previous.

Now I know it’s the thought that counts and with open arms I would have a booming smile on my face however for fucks sake man this particular girl doesn’t love milk tray she loves Galaxy chocolate! If you loved me you’d know this!!

My husband and I do the usual every year. We sometimes buy each other a card and treat ourselves to a bag of fish and chips, a bottle of wine and have a good old chinwag about the day.

We don’t sit there oohing and ahhing over each other we just appreciate each other’s company and have a good laugh in the process.

I married my husband for who he is not to tell him I love him repeatedly on Valentines day. I know how much he appreciates me and the sacrifices we have both made for one another over the past six years. I don’t need cupids bow to show me this nor do I need a dwindling bank balance to show that either. If someone loves you they love you for you end of.

Exercise it needs to be stepped up a notch I’ve felt myself go downhill over the past week. As for the food aspect of this post well I think I’ve just dropped myself in it by saying I’ve had fish and chips!

To conclude today’s post. Value yourself, surround yourself with the people who make you smile and don’t allow others to write an ending to your story. We all have moments and we all at times feel alone however that’s not what life’s all about. Meeting new people can only be a good thing as it opens doors for new opportunities and lifelong friendships. Do what makes you happy.

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Saz

Overcoming worry, anxiety and learning to cope with epilepsy. I dedicate this blog to my family and to all those people out there who thought the possible was impossible. Life isn’t about doing everything yesterday it’s about finding acceptance and taking your time. This blog has been created to document my findings and to allow others to understand that they are not alone. I have tried my best to collate these concerns for others to read should they wish. The intention is to not only address my concerns of my condition however I also intend to address my daily struggles whilst giving an insight as to what my days entail.