My mother sadly passed away 16th December last year.  I like and hope to think that it was the release she would have wanted from suffering from dementia, but who knows……


Although she was nearly 93 and had been suffering from dementia for some time, it was hard to know as to how long she would need to keep battling with this awful condition.  However suddenly she couldn’t swallow, she went to drink but didn’t then know what to do when it was in her mouth, apparently this is a typical symptom of dementia.  Surely I should have known this fact in all the information I had read previously, but it clearly passed me by and I was really quite shocked.  The home where she was,  looked after her with complete kindness and great care and true to their word there was certainly no mention of having to go into hospital – it was in her own room and bed that she would stay.

She died in the evening at 1100, at exactly the same time my watch stopped for no apparent reason……

I wondered how I would feel and I was concerned about two particular points.  One was whether I would grieve, as she had been taken away from us 18 months ago to all intents and purposes when the dementia was in it last stages.  And secondly how I would remember her – defined by a very old lady with dementia, or a very strong minded and capable lady.   As it turns out the two intermingled almost the minute she died, I grieved for the person that was my mother who suddenly I remembered only as the person I had known for all my life and that included all her good and bad points!



Hello - I am Catriona and part of the talkhealth team. I initially started my blog based on my experiences of having a mother with the diagnosis of vasular dementia. Any views expressed are my own.