Wet water!

1 Mar 2014

“Well I nearly did fall over tonight following you at the swimming pool – I stepped on some wet water and slipped.” Said Mr WLB last night.

“Wet water, really?” I said.

Now the scientific amongst you – or cosmetic peeps, or those who transport dangerous goods! – will know that there is such a thing as dry water…but us mere mortals might have had – as I did – a real giggle at Mr WLB and his wet water.

Bless him – he does make me laugh. We were chatting in bed last night about how he seems to be less clumsy since starting Pilates…and he came out with that beauty!

Tonight’s blog post is going to be a very quick read…as I am shattered.

Not only am I suffering from my severely achy muscles – which really wasn’t helped last night by the swimming – but I have been on babysitting duty today with a raucous three year old and a five year old with attitude…and for an hour or so I also had a five week old to keep an eye on.

I got up way too early for my tired body to cope with and made my way to Pilates. It was another great session and, for the time I was there, my muscles were nicely stretched and the pain was relieved a little.

We then had a mad spell – collecting shelves from my Mums house…as she is moving on Tuesday, checking on the horses, posting sweets to America for a friend, doing our shopping, cooking lunch and prepping dinner…within two hours as I needed to get to my sisters house for the babysitting.

This rushing around led to a little awkward moment which Mr WLB found highly amusing. I was responding to an email that my personal trainer had sent me whilst cooking lunch, prepping dinner and trying to wash clothes. My mind was not really on the job…and I ended up putting an ‘x’ at the end of the email.

As soon as I had sent it, I had that sinking stomach moment! A fecking ‘x’ to my trainer…this is just not good. I made a little squeal noise, and Mr WLB asked what was wrong. I explained, and said that I was going to write an email saying that the ‘x’ was a mistake…but he said that this makes it far worse, despite the numerous wordings I proposed.

Bloody hell! I remember telling a client that I loved them once…and have said things like, “Okay, great – see you later darling”, when not meaning ‘darling’ at all. It’s a sign that I am either bored with a conversation or not paying attention – such as trying to do sixteen things at once. I need to realise that I am not a great multi-tasker! :-)

Thankfully, he responded well. He did call me ‘dude’…and there was no ‘x’ on the end of his email…so I think I am safe. I would hate for him to think that I have a girl crush on him – although he is by far the most handsome trainer at the gym! My girl crushes are reserved for Mr WLB…and maybe Justin Timberlake, The Braxton brothers (any / all of them!), Josh Holloway, Jamie Dornan, Scott Foley, Emmett J Scanlan…so yeah, I do get girl crushes – but Mr WLB is my main man – the rest are just window shopping. No harm unless you finger the goods so to speak! ;-)

Seriously though – I hate that weirdness that occasionally happens when you are just being nice. I hate it when women mistake nice guys for flirts and visa versa. Like the donkey in the swimming pool last night. I think some of it stems from my feelings about myself though…I would hate for someone that I was working with to be scared off if they mistook my friendliness for interest…I have heard a chap once say, “Jesus, I hope she doesn’t fancy me – that would make me throw up!”, about me – so I guess this has stuck in my mind.

It was rather ironic though as he was a little weasel…and my boyfriend at the time looked like a Justin Timberlake double…so whilst this chap might have found me sickening, there have been – Mr WLB well and truly included in this – some real lookers who haven’t…men who are confident in themselves and don’t need arm candy to boost their credibility! Although I guess I am boosting mine with my very own arm candy! :-)

Mr WLB is all the man I need…and if all else fails there’s Ann Summers…at least their products don’t answer back! ;-)

Anyway – back to the babysitting…

It was a little hectic. We made some PlayDoh stuff – first up is the interpretation by Mr WLB and I of caterpillars…photo 9Do you like the snazzy hat on my caterpillar?!

Then it was the turn of the kiddlywinks and their creations – my three year old nephew really isn’t into the creative stuff…he prefers his tool box…photo 10Then they wanted photos of themselves taking…photo 3photo 2photo 1It was then that we decided to make biscuits with something called ‘Yummy Dough’. It looks like bloody awful stuff – but it was Mr WLBs idea and the kids loved it…this was the resulting mess on mine and my nieces hands…photo 4…and the finished products…photo 5We then had den time, watched Thomas the Tank, then we watched Ariel before dinner. Then it was finally bedtime – which my niece has perfected with Mr WLB. She has him wrapped around her little finger. If I put them to bed they are upstairs, toileted, teeth brushed and tucked up with five minutes…ten minutes tops. She managed to convince him to read four stories…and it took nearly an hour. I was going to go and rescue him at one point.

In fact, I almost had to rescue him when it came to my nephew. He has finally started using the toilet properly, but obviously still needs help to clean up…you would have thought that someone was asking Mr WLB to walk through a sewerage main or something. “I don’t do THAT!”, he almost cried…”If you want to be a foster carer, you’d better bloody well get used to it!”, was my response. He manned up eventually – but not before trying every doe-eyed look on me that he could! ;-)

So that was my day. A wonderful childish and creative day – it was great fun.

And now I need sleep! :-)

Breakfast: Banana porridge (5 syns).photo 7Lunch: Smoked salmon, broccoli and French bean quiche.photo 8Dinner: Steak, stuffed mushrooms, roasted red onion, tomatoes, butternut squash, and peppers with wholemeal rolls (2 x HEA and 2 x HEB).photoSnacks: Rice cakes (6 syns).photo 6A gorgeous food day. My usual for brekkie. Lunch was delicious – I made a crustless quiche. A tub of cottage cheese mixed with three eggs acts as the batter…you then put in whatever you fancy. I chose smoked salmon, broccoli, red onion and French beans…and topped it with sliced tomatoes, put it in the oven and cooked it until golden brown. Dinner was lovely too. Steak on a Saturday is becoming a regular thing in our house! We had mushrooms stuffed with garlic and herb Philadelphia, roast tomatoes, red onion, peppers and butternut squash with it. And then I had four of the rice cakes for a TV snack.

Exercise: 60 minutes of Pilates.

Thank you for reading,

Weight Loss Bitch xxx



On a health and fitness driven journey to lose over 32st / 448lbs / 203kgs – yes, it is a considerable amount – I am committed to losing my excess weight without the aid of weight loss surgery, diet pills, or quick fixes…as there aren’t any! Changing my eating habits and building up my fitness levels, along with addressing the ‘head issues’ will be crucial in order for me to achieve my goal. Living in England as a 31 year old super morbidly obese woman can be challenging to say the least. I have been shouted at in the street and verbally abused far too many times to mention; hence the name ‘Weight Loss Bitch’…the day I am just called a ‘bitch’ instead of a ‘fat bitch’ will be the day that I know I have cracked my weight loss! With many reasons to lose this weight I am documenting my journey for a number of reasons. Firstly, I would like to keep a record of the ups and downs, the highs and lows, and the challenges I face with such an enormous task to tackle. Secondly, I would also like to inspire and encourage other people who are in a similar situation and to show them that significant amounts of weight can be lost naturally…with a bit of motivation, hard work, dedication and will power. Thirdly, all of the blogging, Facebook-ing, Tweet-ing, Pinterest-ing and YouTube-ing keeps me occupied and keeps my fingers out of the fridge!

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