talkhealth Blog

It certainly isn’t easy – this losing weight malarkey!

I am not aware of anyone who attends a Slimming World group who doesn’t want to shift some weight and become a bit healthier. Yet if we want it so much, why is it so bloody difficult to achieve?

This is not a blog post about the merits of certain diets over others. There are some who say that they have put weight on with Slimming World…I have a feeling that this has more to do with portion control and ‘eyes being bigger than bellies’ as my Dad would put it, rather than the plan itself. You have to moderate yourself…if it seems too good to be true – like a whole plate of syn-free chips, or a massive bowl of pasta – then it probably is too good to be true!

What I wanted to get off my chest tonight is how fecking hard it can be at times to stick to a healthy eating plan…to commit to something that you want so desperately…yet seems just out of your grasp.

My own experiences have taught me time and time again that I have to make my healthy lifestyle a priority – I had to get selfish and put myself first!

For me, there are no half measures…if I want it – and I bloody well do – then I have to do absolutely everything within my power to achieve it. This means sticking to the plan when everyone else around me isn’t – on holiday, on Christmas Day, on New Years Eve, on my birthday, during Easter…there are no ‘off days’ for me. This means going to the gym when I know that I could get better weight loss results sitting on the sofa…because this is about more than just weight loss. This means skipping nights out at times. It means not sharing ‘naughty’ food with my niece and nephew. It means not eating my fill in places like ‘The Oban Chocolate Company’.

Now all of the above might sound horrifically boring to you. Life is for living after all. It certainly is…but my life was fading a couple of years ago…and I never ever want to feel that way again. So living the way I do now feels like a breeze in comparison to life back then…and I actually have a life now!

It also feels like a breeze as I have done so much work to get my mind in the right place. I understand my triggers, my limitations, my buttons…I understand what I need to do to keep myself on track…and this varies from person to person.

Before, like most of my fellow losers, I would attempt to lose weight by focussing upon what I couldn’t eat and on having to go to the bloody gym. So this focus upon what I couldn’t do anymore, and what I felt that I had to do, was almost like torture…I felt like Slimming World was a prison that stopped me from living the life that I wanted to live.

Yet when I thought about it – really thought about it – Slimming World was not a fecking prison at all…it was giving me my life back, not taking it away from me!

I realised that the food I ate and the movement I undertook would need to improve…but what needed the most work was my mind. Unfortunately for me, help of the mind variety was in very short supply. I was quoted £600 and £225 per hour for some mind help – I only charge £75 per hour for my coaching! – and it was out of my league really…plus, the people offering the help had no base of experience…they had never had a weight issue and I couldn’t see myself opening up to them about my crazy food-related habits. So I started my own mind work. I used the coaching stuff that I used to do in a corporate environment and combined this with my personal weight issues – along with years of research and education – and got myself sorted. I used CBT techniques, NLP, motivational interviewing, solution-focused coaching…anything I could to challenge those views I had of myself…the view that despite wanting it so badly, I would never get my dream!

My mind is in such a fabulous place now…it really is.

Yet there are days that come along that weaken my resolve and test that mind! Those days when nothing seems to go right. Today has been a little like that…Mr WLB has been smoke-free for almost 48 hours, which has been a trying time for both of us. He’s still not feeling well either and that is stressing us both out. I have had a number of cravings today which haven’t been helped by stupid fecking TV adverts – with ‘even cheesier Cheddars’ being advertised! I had some bad financial news today too…which puts significant pressure on us…so giving up that £45k a year job to focus on my health seems like a not-so-good decision today – especially when I only work with five coaching clients at a time, so that’s hardy a money-spinner for me…but if it was about the money, then I doubt I would be doing it! And my clothes don’t fit…I nearly went arse over tit climbing the stairs as my PJ bottoms keep falling down and I tripped on them! I know all of this stuff sounds very trivial, but it’s been tough to remain focussed on healthy living when things around me are ballsing up.

Despite all of this, I am not giving in. I want to be healthy more than I want the taste of cheesier fecking Cheddars!

Apologies for my rambling blog post tonight…I have a lot on my mind. But even though my mind is weighed down, I am determined that my body won’t be. And you too can get that feeling. I am never one for saying, ‘If I can do it, then anyone can!’…as I have no idea about your life and your limitations. But I will tell you one thing – you can improve upon how you feel now…you can get that mind in the right place; once it’s there then it’s hard to move it!

So you have heard about my day. There were some great points too – such as doing some training with my horses…with football rattles and a giant rainbow umbrella…I will grab a picture of it all for you at some point. And Pilates – my Pilates session was good today. Mr WLB is now relaxing in the bath whilst I am going to watch some ‘Person of Interest’…John’s voice is strangely relaxing!

Breakfast: Boiled eggs and a banana.

Lunch: Ryvita, cheese, radishes, pepper, donut peach, cherry tomatoes (2 x HEB and 2 x HEA).

Dinner: Salmon, asparagus, French beans, and roasted butternut squash.

Snacks: Raspberries, watermelon, and blueberries with Nakd bars (13 syns).

A lovely food day! My usual brekkie was followed by a current trend…Ryvita with Philadelphia, smoked salmon, and veggie bits and bobs. I also added a donut peach as I love them. Dinner was lush – lightly smoked salmon fillets with steamed asparagus and French beans, with roasted butternut squash. My snacks were lush too…some delicious raspberries, juicy watermelon, and a bowl of blueberries with chopped rhubarb and custard Nakd bars.

Exercise: 60 minute Pilates session and an hour of horse training!

Thank you for reading,

Weight Loss Bitch xxx

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WeightLossBitch

On a health and fitness driven journey to lose over 32st / 448lbs / 203kgs – yes, it is a considerable amount – I am committed to losing my excess weight without the aid of weight loss surgery, diet pills, or quick fixes…as there aren’t any! Changing my eating habits and building up my fitness levels, along with addressing the ‘head issues’ will be crucial in order for me to achieve my goal. Living in England as a 31 year old super morbidly obese woman can be challenging to say the least. I have been shouted at in the street and verbally abused far too many times to mention; hence the name ‘Weight Loss Bitch’…the day I am just called a ‘bitch’ instead of a ‘fat bitch’ will be the day that I know I have cracked my weight loss! With many reasons to lose this weight I am documenting my journey for a number of reasons. Firstly, I would like to keep a record of the ups and downs, the highs and lows, and the challenges I face with such an enormous task to tackle. Secondly, I would also like to inspire and encourage other people who are in a similar situation and to show them that significant amounts of weight can be lost naturally…with a bit of motivation, hard work, dedication and will power. Thirdly, all of the blogging, Facebook-ing, Tweet-ing, Pinterest-ing and YouTube-ing keeps me occupied and keeps my fingers out of the fridge!