12 Jun 2014

This isn’t about balance in the traditional sense – although I have done some mean moves on a bosu and a foam roller recently! It’s all about balance in the slimming sense.

As an ‘all or nothing’ creature, I find balance hard – and I know that I am not alone in this.

For me, a meal off-plan used to send me into a panic and I would just think ‘sod it’…and ruin all of the previous hard work. I liken it to slashing the three remaining tyres on your car when you get a puncture! You know it makes no sense at all…but you still bloody do it.

I say this time and time again – progress, not perfection. I say it, but it’s hard to actually remember it.

When I first started my current Slimming World campaign, I knew that I had to do something differently…when I was six months in! What I was doing was not working. The perfectionist in me was actually pushing me so far away from perfect – it was ruining me – the all or nothing approach was not working, and had not worked during all of my other attempts at shifting this weight.

My first target was to stop binging on junk food and to switch to Slimming World food. Something I both love and hate about Slimming World is the ‘free’ food list. I love it because it allowed me to binge without feeling guilty – which helped me gain a sense of control, as the food was ‘on-plan’…I wasn’t going over my points or allowance. I hate it because it can, in some circumstances, allow people to keep binging and to kid themselves that they are ‘on-plan’. All fecking food has calories, and too many of these buggers means that you get fat and stay fat. So you have to moderate yourself at some point.

As I said, mine was a planned path of progress – binging on junk to binging on Slimming World food to not binging at all.

And I haven’t binged in well over 18 months.

So that little plan of action worked for me.

I tried to avoid this perfection that I kept aiming for. One bad meal will not break your hard work. But one bad meal followed by an epic binge, followed by a massive ‘sod it’ breakfast the following morning, followed by a day of feeling sorry for yourself shite food probably will break your hard work for that week. For that week…for that week…not for the rest of your life! ;-)

If you have a few bad days – well, what is that in the grand scheme of things?

My ‘normal’ friends – and by normal I mean those without weight issues…as they are far from normal…but then I could argue all night long that there is no such thing as normal anyway! But – my normal friends have bad days too. They wake up and feel crappy and they have crappy food days. The difference between them and me, is that they don’t dwell on it. They wake up the following day and get straight back to their usual way of eating. A crappy day is a non issue for them.

For me – well, for me it would be a mammoth deal now. At first, whilst I was ramping up towards my plan of action, it wasn’t an issue. I would have a week off plan and get back on track. I would have a meal off plan and get back on track. I knew where I was heading.

As I got to the stage that the binging stopped, and my food choices changed, I found it harder to contemplate a meal off plan. I prepare all of my food now. If I want to eat out, I arrange where we go and I ask for my food to be cooked how I want it cooked…yes, I am a nightmare! ;-) I arrange BBQs at my stables so that I can control the food and how it’s cooked.

It’s my birthday on Monday and my Dad wants to cook for us both at his house on Sunday – a joint birthday / Father’s Day thing. And I am panicking. I asked him what he was cooking. Tandoori chicken. I asked if he was using fat free yogurt to make it…he thought so…though so. So I am panicking. When he cooks for me – which has been never since this Slimming World campaign began as I am a bit of a control freak! – he always tells me that it’s Slimming World apart from the olive oil. And I panic.

Now a bit of olive oil is not a bad thing. It’s actually quite good if it’s measured and controlled…but my Dad takes after the Jamie Oliver school of olive oil usage and glugs it on very liberally! 120 calories per tablespoon! So I am feeling a little panic…but am trying to balance this. I have lost over 20st. Is one meal with a bit of full fat yogurt going to hurt me? Probably not.

So I am going to challenge you to find your balance. If you have found it already, then share your secret!

Balance – it’s a good thing…apart from when you are trying to balance on the scales each week to get a favourable result! ;-) I remember the old scales at Slimming World – I used to try and lean back to not put all of my weight on them…bloody stupid.

That’s it from me tonight. Mr WLB is watching the World Cup opening ceremony. I am going to go and watch some more episodes of ‘Orange is the New Black’ – it’s fab! Although I did have to warn my sister, as my niece logs into my Netflix account to watch her programmes…and I do not want her clicking on my history…it’s been a bit racy so far! Today has been good. Two great coaching sessions. A great PT session. I actually had a go at one of the gym challenges for this month. My name is on the board, but I am not leading and I was a bit gutted. Progress – not perfection though. I am going to have another go next week and see what I can do!

Breakfast: Boiled eggs and a banana.

20140612-193237.jpgLunch: Meatfree burgers and salad (2 x HEB).

20140612-193317.jpgDinner: Sweet potato with mixed bean ratatouille with feta (2 x HEA).

20140612-193508.jpgSnacks: Nakd bars (15 syns).

20140612-193548.jpgAn okay food day. It was all a bit rushed today due to my lack of planning. My brekkie wasn’t enough to fuel my rather hardcore workout, so I grabbed one of the Nakd bars to eat afterwards…as I was in danger of passing out! Lunch was eaten a bit later – the Quorn syn free burgers – with salad…it was nice, but didn’t really hit the spot! :-( Dinner was good – jacket sweet potato with feta cheese, mixed beans and a ratatouille made with tomato, onion, peppers, courgette, chilli flakes, garlic, and spinach. The Nakd bars were okay…but these ones are a bit too sweet for me. I got a bit of a sugar rush – but they were thrown in free with my recent order, so it would have been rude not to eat them! ;-)

Exercise: An elliptical warm-up followed by a hardcore PT workout – lots of dead lifts and upper body work.

Thank you for reading,

Weight Loss Bitch xxx



On a health and fitness driven journey to lose over 32st / 448lbs / 203kgs – yes, it is a considerable amount – I am committed to losing my excess weight without the aid of weight loss surgery, diet pills, or quick fixes…as there aren’t any! Changing my eating habits and building up my fitness levels, along with addressing the ‘head issues’ will be crucial in order for me to achieve my goal. Living in England as a 31 year old super morbidly obese woman can be challenging to say the least. I have been shouted at in the street and verbally abused far too many times to mention; hence the name ‘Weight Loss Bitch’…the day I am just called a ‘bitch’ instead of a ‘fat bitch’ will be the day that I know I have cracked my weight loss! With many reasons to lose this weight I am documenting my journey for a number of reasons. Firstly, I would like to keep a record of the ups and downs, the highs and lows, and the challenges I face with such an enormous task to tackle. Secondly, I would also like to inspire and encourage other people who are in a similar situation and to show them that significant amounts of weight can be lost naturally…with a bit of motivation, hard work, dedication and will power. Thirdly, all of the blogging, Facebook-ing, Tweet-ing, Pinterest-ing and YouTube-ing keeps me occupied and keeps my fingers out of the fridge!

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