Good day my lovely followers! I hope that everyone is doing as well as possible. I know that some of you have been able to power through and get some kind of work done or you may have even been able to do something active. I also know that there are lots of us who are so crippled by the pain and our other symptoms that we are lucky to be able to move and get out of bed. I think about ALL of us who suffer with varying degrees of this crappy condition, and I wish I could give gentle hugs to everyone.
I have come to understand that one of the worst things about Fibromyalgia is that the symptoms can range so greatly from person to person, it makes it hard to explain to someone else. There is always a “friend of a co-worker” who has Fibromyalgia, but she still works or she doesn’t need any assistance with getting around. It’s sometimes hard to explain to people that if five of us have Fibromyalgia, then there will five different lists of symptoms. I haven’t quite figured out if we have been made of stronger stuff as women, but when it comes to pain we will often just suck it up and get on with things as best we can. I know it, because it’s what I did for so long.
I look pretty healthy – other than the crutch I have to always use to get around – and I have often wondered if it was all in my head.
I don’t know if you guys are anything like me, but it has always been during the times when I tried to convince myself I DIDN’T have Fibromyalgia, that I have tried to do too much and received really horrible rebound pain the next morning. I can’t say that I have mastered this “I-Have-a-chronic-and-hard-to-explain-Condition”. Actually, I find it really hard a lot of the time because I am used to being busy. I used to be able to drive to work and go to the gym to work out. I could walk for hours or dance around my living room to music. I used to be able to take out seven (7) books at a time from the library and I would have them all read within three weeks – I love the feel of holding a physical book. I have had to make changes and to adapt.
It’s okay for me to not always have to be doing something. I am not allowed to drive anymore because of how the pain medications affect me, but I have also had to stop working because of the pain. I can’t walk more than 10m before I need to be pushed in my wheelchair. However, we live near the town center and my kids and husband are eager to push me the few minutes into town. I get to be home when my kids are home and watch them as they finish up their secondary education. I can still enjoy my music nice and loud, but just without the dancing like a lunatic. I also have a Kindle and do a lot of reading with it. It isn’t the same as a physical book, but how else would I travel with over 75 books anyhow?
I think the thing that I have found the hardest is to let my family know when I am in pain. I hate complaining or feeling like a burden, but there are some times when it’s okay to say “No, I can’t do this because of the pain.” We all know, that unless someone wears our shoes, it is really hard to fully understand what it’s like to live with Fibromyalgia. I would point out that most of us don’t want to been seen as whiners and we have simply accepted that the pain is going to last. For those of you who love us and want to support us, we just need you to know that just because we aren’t complaining 24 hours/7 days a week, doesn’t mean we aren’t in pain. I am truly lucky because my husband and kids have been a wonderful support to me. It has totally changed the dynamic of our family, but not always in a bad way. They all look at ways they can help, and I look at ways that I can step back and let them.
To all of my fellow Fibro Warriors: Here’s to all of us fighting the good fight.