ANXIETY AFTER GRIEF

Post your questions about anxiety here.

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cookiemonster66
Posts: 13
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2010 1:32 pm
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by cookiemonster66 on Mon Sep 17, 2018 3:45 pm

ANXIETY AFTER GRIEF

My young daughter died suddenly aged just 30 a couple of years ago, we don't know why, they said sudden adult death on death certificate. Few months after my dad died suddenly of cancer. I have always been quite a fretful person, but now I worry about my surviving daughter, and now new baby granddaughter, stupid things like if she says she is going on a long car journey, or on holiday, I get endless nightmares about planes/car crashing. I stress about my granddaughter dying from choking, or accidents, and recent one is she is starting nursery, so I spent whole night in a state worried she got out, got run over, or nursery was on fire. Completely irrational fears that are all consuming. My biggest fear is that I could not go through that pain again of losing another child. I understand it is linked to my daughters death so all those fears are magnified beyond reason. I try to keep a rein on them getting out of control. I do practice mindfulness as I am quite anti-drugs, did not take any antidepressants etc after the deaths. She is starting nursery next week and already I am losing sleep worrying about it. My daughter said she would take me to the nursery to allay my fears so I can do a health and safety check for myself. I cannot understand how these thoughts evolve when I already know they are irrational, and why they happen, so why can't I fix/stop it?

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Teyhou Smyth
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Joined: Thu Sep 06, 2018 10:48 am
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by Teyhou Smyth on Thu Sep 20, 2018 7:46 pm

Re: ANXIETY AFTER GRIEF

Hi

Thank you for sharing your story with us and I am sorry for the sudden losses that you have endured recently.

Anxiety is a common part of the grieving process, but if your anxiety symptoms do not dissipate after 6 months after the loss of a loved one, you may be experiencing a complicated grief or an anxiety disorder. When you suffer a loss, the effects can feel paralyzing. Grieving people often feel that they have lost their sense of safety and control in life, and they find themselves panicking or worrying excessively about what or whom else they could lose in the future. They also may have trouble sleeping or taking care of themselves, which can put them at higher risk for anxiety.

If symptoms of initial anxiety after a loss do not dissipate, you may be experiencing an anxiety disorder. Symptoms of an anxiety disorder include can include excessive worry, restlessness, being easily fatigued
trouble concentrating, irritability, sleep disturbance, muscle tension, specific phobias and social anxiety
People experiencing anxiety after a loss are also may also have panic attacks. Let your doctor know if you experience shortness of breath, chest pain, a sensation of choking, nausea, dizziness, chill or heat sensations, and fear of dying.

The grieving process can be complex in nature but there is help and support available to help you gain back your sense of control, manage symptoms, and calm anxious thinking. Counseling can introduce coping skills for anxiety symptoms and also provide grief support by allowing a person to discuss the loss in a safe and non-judging environment.

The following organizations would be able to guide you to further resources:
Cruse Bereavement Care http://cruse.org.uk
The British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists http://bacp.co.uk

I hope that you find this information useful and are able to access the support that you need.
Teyhou Smyth
Registered Associate Marriage and Family Therapist and Registered Associate Professional Clinical Counselor

http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/on ... _smyth.php

cookiemonster66
Posts: 13
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2010 1:32 pm
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by cookiemonster66 on Thu Sep 20, 2018 8:15 pm

Re: ANXIETY AFTER GRIEF

Thanks for your advice, I saw the Dr who diagnosed Fibromyalgia as I am getting many of those symptoms you described. I will suggest it may be grief related see what they say and get some counselling for the anxiety disorder. Thanks for taking the time to reply.

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