Painful sex and bad experiences

Do you experience pain when having sex? If so, ask our experts here.

Moderator: talkhealth

Locked
3 posts
Steph King
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 26, 2012 12:45 pm
Quote

by Steph King on Mon Mar 26, 2012 2:11 pm

Painful sex and bad experiences

I hope you can help me as I havn't had much luck with doctors in the past.
I used to have regular healthy sex with my boyfriend with no problems at all, however, one day when he penetrated me i felt a sudden sharp pain. We thought it perhaps a one off and we would try again another day. I was 20 at this point. Nearly 3 years later we are still unable to have sex. It steadlily grew worse over about 5 months until i couldn't even take a lubricated finger with out extreme pain. It is a sharp burning pain in my vagina on penetration (it actually feels like I'm trying to put something too big in too small an opening) kinda like a chinese burn in my vagina, and I no longer produce much of my own lubrication although it is still painful with artificial lube.
I went to the doctor and he referred me to a gynaecologist who booked me in for a laproscapy and hystoscopy. He told me it could be endometriosis or polycystic ovaries (I also have more painful and longer than average periods which I had also asked about). He also said it could be something called vulvadynia, a condition he confessed to not knowing much about, but he referred me to a website with some information on the topic. When I had the surgery my uterus and ovaries were all clear. He said that my cervix had been a little narrower than usual and that there were some 'inside' cells on the outside (I don't really know what he meant by that) which could cause some pain so he said he widened and cauterised it and that it should reheal properly. I asked when or if I would be able to have sex again, but he looked at me a bit blankly and then dismissed the question like it wasn't important. He just said wait till you are healed. About a month later we tried and it was just as painful as ever.
A few months later I went back to the doctors and was referred again to a gynaecologist. I was in a new city now so it was a different hospital I went to. I spoke a to a trainee gynaecologist first who was very sympathetic but understandably not quite sure so she went and got her supervising doctor. I started to expain to him about my previous exam and how the previous gynaecologist had mentioned vulvadynia. I was then snapped at and told that I didn't have vulvadynia (I hadn't been examined at this point). When he did examine me I mentioned previously that it had been so painful the doctor had had to use a smaller instrument (a cone like thing to 'hold me open'). He continued regardless and the exam was unbearably painful. I felt he was being quite rough given the condition I had explained and that I suffered more than was necessary. Even the trainee doctor looked a bit upset at his treatment of me. Afterwards, he left barely saying a word to me and a nurse came in a little later with a dialator. She politely explained how to use it and told me if i wasn't better in 6 months to ring and she would have a provisional appointment with the gynaecologist ready for me. I was quite shaken by my treatment and my boyfriend (who had been present) was furious. I wasn't better in 6 months, but I certainly wasn't going back to him!
I have been using the dialator ever since. Even the smallest size was too much for me to begin with and I had to buy an even smaller dildo and work my way up from that. A year and a half later (I'm 23 now) and I have managed to work up to the second size of the dialator. Two more to go! I did some research on my own on painful sex. I discovered that it seems to be a bit of a taboo still. Apparetnly some gynaecologists don't see it as a real condition. Is this why th e doctor was so short with me? I stopped taking microgynon as I had read it can disrupt pH in that area and can cause discomfort. It means my periods are impossible to predict (that's why I started taking it in the first place) but if it helps me get better it's a small price to pay I feel. I've had 2 smear tests and they've come back fine and I use a special vaginal wash rather than soaps so as not to aggravate the area. But my questions aren't answered and I'm sorry to say I'm scared of seeing a gynaecologist again. How and why did this happen? What caused it? Will it happen again?
Sorry for the essay I've given you! But if you know everything then perhaps you can better help in advising me in what I should do next and maybe even what is actually causing it in the first place! Thank you in advance!

User avatar
Dr Heather Currie
Posts: 38
Joined: Tue Mar 20, 2012 11:28 am
Quote

by Dr Heather Currie on Mon Mar 26, 2012 7:40 pm

Re: Painful sex and bad experiences

How awful for you. Has anyone mentioned vaginismus? This is when the vaginal muscles go into a kind of cramp, causing significant pain. It can happen as a reaction to a painful experience and causes most pain just inside the vagina. There are various techniques which can help. If this has not been considered it is certainly worth discussing.
Dr Heather Currie
Associate Specialist Gynaecologist
Dumfries and Galloway Royal Infirmary

http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/on ... currie.php

Steph King
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 26, 2012 12:45 pm
Quote

by Steph King on Tue Mar 27, 2012 2:54 pm

Re: Painful sex and bad experiences

Thank you! No it hasn't. I've seen it mentioned before but not with an explanation of what it was. That sounds like it could make sense looking back. But roughly speaking, what sort of options are there for this? It sounds like something that would involve some sort of psychological treatment as well as physical?

Locked
3 posts