Am I an alcoholic?

[alcoholic?]

Hello - I'm a man in my 50's and always loved a drink or two. As I've got older my partner has become more concerned with my drinking habits saying it is affecting my health and that I drink too much. She says it affects my moods and my ability to think straight. I drink, on average, a couple of pints and a bottle / bottle and a half of wine each day. I never get drunk so I'm sure this is an OK amount. Although of late I do feel less happy with life - whether that's because I'm getting older or whether it is the drinking I'm not sure. I wouldn't admit this to my partner as it would give her the perfect opportunity to keep nagging me about my drinking. In my heart of hearts I know I should do something about it but it's very hard. I do tend to bury my head in the sand and this used to help but is now getting me down. I daren't tell my doctor as wouldn't want all this on my medical notes as if my employer were to discover my drinking habits it might affect things for me.

What advice would you give me - am I drinking too much? Surely I'm not an alcoholic as an alcoholic is someone who's drinking from the minute they are out of bed in the morning til the minute they are back in bed at night. I only drink in the evenings.

Thanks.

[saraht]

This is a good question. Alcoholism is a progressive disease, very rarely do people drink alcoholically, instantly.
It appears that you have become dependent on drinking daily, a habit that will become more and more difficult to break.
Your partner is right to be concerned, as I am sure that neither she nor you want this to progress to the stage that you describe, i.e. having to drink in the mornings to function or just get out of bed.

Drinking Alcohol in the quantity and regularity that you now do, becomes a depressant. So it is inevitable that you will feel down. Booze is sneaky at this stage, and the feeling that the first drink gives you is one of being relaxed and chilled, but sadly the next 5 or 6 will bring you down. At the moment, you are drinking twice the recommended limits for a man, and I know you your heart of hearts that this is not a great plan!

So if perhaps you could just for today, decide not to have a drink, get some delicious soft drinks for this evening. Once you break the habit, get out of the cycle, you will be able to make choices about how much, if at all, you drink. For now, you still have a choice.

Hope that helps.
Sarah.

[Annette Boden - Counsellor]

I fully agree with all that Sarah has said.
Alcohol is a depressant and depresses the central nervous system- it impacts negatively on sleep patterns and mood and is physically harmful over prolongued periods of time. I would certainly recommend cutting down or abstaining for a while but I appreciate this is easier said than done as with all habits, but habits and patterns can be broken. It is a question of looking for some healthier alternatives to help you and addressing any issues that are causing you to drink, such as underlying stress or emotional triggers.

[Annette Boden - Counsellor]

The underlyng causes of why you are drinking the amount you do every night may not be apparent as you have formed a habit.
'Alcohol dependence' and 'problem drinking' are terms that are used to describe alcohol issues more commonly than 'alcoholic' at the levels you have mentioned you are drinking. The frequency and amount of alcohol intake may be masking/ even adding to or creating anxieties or becoming a stressor as I mentioned in my previous post. I think you could certainly try reducing your intake - as we get older our bodies are less able to tolerate habits and patterns that we may have been able to recover form when we were younger. I am wondering what your sleeping patterns are like and if you have noticed any decrease in your apetite? The fact that you have come on to this forum is a postive step and acknowledging some of the problems you are experiencing is the first step in taking action to break these patterns. If you reduce/remove alcohol for a while it will enable you to have a good look at your physical and emotional needs and then talk to your GP about how these can be met.
You may want to consider excercise such as a walk before or after tea or a new hobby to absorb your attention in as a replacement to your nightly alcohol intake. It is not easy to reduce/let go of any habit but it does get easier.