Advice on Coping with Stress
Moderator: talkhealth
Advice on Coping with Stress
I would like some advice on coping with stress.
I have been stressed before, but not to the point where it has worried me, like this. I feel snowed under with university work, being in my 3rd year is taking its toll. I have to worry about dissertation, personal statements, PGCE applications, along with another course I am doing which runs along side my degree, etc. Also with this I have some personal family worries.
I am not sleeping very well, and find that I feel tired all the time. I have mood swings, but have been quite low, more often than not recently. I am rather emotional and feel like I am struggling to deal with it all.
Any advice would be a great help.
I have been stressed before, but not to the point where it has worried me, like this. I feel snowed under with university work, being in my 3rd year is taking its toll. I have to worry about dissertation, personal statements, PGCE applications, along with another course I am doing which runs along side my degree, etc. Also with this I have some personal family worries.
I am not sleeping very well, and find that I feel tired all the time. I have mood swings, but have been quite low, more often than not recently. I am rather emotional and feel like I am struggling to deal with it all.
Any advice would be a great help.
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Gary Turner
- Posts: 107
- Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2013 9:04 am
Re: Advice on Coping with Stress
Hi,
Stress is fatigue of the mind and/or body brought on by prolonged anxiety.
Anxiety is a mood, the overal experience of the emotion of fear. The emotion in the brain, the feeling created in the body, and the cognition as it hits our thoughts and awareness.
Fear is the unknown. The "what if's". The "I don't know what will happen". The uncertainty.
This leaves the mind often racing, the chattering monkeys distracting you from a task, often at times such as night when you are not distracted leaving you trapped in your thoughts, and you often start imagining the negatives rather than the positives.
The negative emotions create real physical changes in your body - tensing you up, raising your metabolism - and this will put your body under 'stress', therefore making you more tired. This can be likened to driving your car with the brakes on. Lots of noise, but not going that far.
Your sleep - is it trouble getting to sleep? If so, it is usually an anticipatory anxiety, about something coming up.
I note that you have been stressed before - I wonder, how did you learn to be that way? What do you need to think and do to be different?
I would suggest seeking some help with the stress - it is often something that you can be released from quite quickly. If you want to know how I work in my hypnotherapy with this including everything you can do yourself to help, take a look at the book I authored on my profile. As a student funds may be short, and this may be cheaper than seeing a hypnotherapist or other such person skilled in working with anxiety. I understand how slow getting results can be going through your GP.
Here's something. Anxiety is often driven by self-talk. You know those chattering monkeys? Ever thought about turning them off? Or distracting them? Here's a few ideas.
Take your tongue and place it hard on the roof of your mouth. Notice what happens to your self-talk when you do this. Quiet? Or quieter? Hebbs law in neurology - what fires together wires together. You're now switching off the physical movements associated with that speech, and with that not firing, it is harder to have the self talk or even impossible.
Listen to that troublesome voice. Who does it sound like? If they were in the room with you, where would they be? What do they look like? In your mind, get some duct tape, and place it over their mouth. Are they now quiet? In your mind, in a way that you would find comforting, give them a hug, and say "ok, I've heard you, but you aren't really helping matters, so for now, please just be quiet, and relax." Notice what happens now...
Distract the voice. A good one for when you can't sleep. In your mind count 1-26 and with each count visualise the corresponding letter fo the alphabet. Count 1, see the letter 'A', count 2, see the letter 'B' and so on...this occupies your mind with alot, like counting sheep...
Focus on something else. Focus on your breathing. Breathe in, breathe out. Hear each breath. Visualise each breath. Experience each breath. Each time you breathe out your body will relax. Focus on the overall breathing experience and you will be focusing on that and not the chattering monkeys.
Mix and match the above too, see what happens!
Just some ideas for you! Yet seek some help if you can, you'll get through it more quickly.
What do you think?
Stress is fatigue of the mind and/or body brought on by prolonged anxiety.
Anxiety is a mood, the overal experience of the emotion of fear. The emotion in the brain, the feeling created in the body, and the cognition as it hits our thoughts and awareness.
Fear is the unknown. The "what if's". The "I don't know what will happen". The uncertainty.
This leaves the mind often racing, the chattering monkeys distracting you from a task, often at times such as night when you are not distracted leaving you trapped in your thoughts, and you often start imagining the negatives rather than the positives.
The negative emotions create real physical changes in your body - tensing you up, raising your metabolism - and this will put your body under 'stress', therefore making you more tired. This can be likened to driving your car with the brakes on. Lots of noise, but not going that far.
Your sleep - is it trouble getting to sleep? If so, it is usually an anticipatory anxiety, about something coming up.
I note that you have been stressed before - I wonder, how did you learn to be that way? What do you need to think and do to be different?
I would suggest seeking some help with the stress - it is often something that you can be released from quite quickly. If you want to know how I work in my hypnotherapy with this including everything you can do yourself to help, take a look at the book I authored on my profile. As a student funds may be short, and this may be cheaper than seeing a hypnotherapist or other such person skilled in working with anxiety. I understand how slow getting results can be going through your GP.
Here's something. Anxiety is often driven by self-talk. You know those chattering monkeys? Ever thought about turning them off? Or distracting them? Here's a few ideas.
Take your tongue and place it hard on the roof of your mouth. Notice what happens to your self-talk when you do this. Quiet? Or quieter? Hebbs law in neurology - what fires together wires together. You're now switching off the physical movements associated with that speech, and with that not firing, it is harder to have the self talk or even impossible.
Listen to that troublesome voice. Who does it sound like? If they were in the room with you, where would they be? What do they look like? In your mind, get some duct tape, and place it over their mouth. Are they now quiet? In your mind, in a way that you would find comforting, give them a hug, and say "ok, I've heard you, but you aren't really helping matters, so for now, please just be quiet, and relax." Notice what happens now...
Distract the voice. A good one for when you can't sleep. In your mind count 1-26 and with each count visualise the corresponding letter fo the alphabet. Count 1, see the letter 'A', count 2, see the letter 'B' and so on...this occupies your mind with alot, like counting sheep...
Focus on something else. Focus on your breathing. Breathe in, breathe out. Hear each breath. Visualise each breath. Experience each breath. Each time you breathe out your body will relax. Focus on the overall breathing experience and you will be focusing on that and not the chattering monkeys.
Mix and match the above too, see what happens!
Just some ideas for you! Yet seek some help if you can, you'll get through it more quickly.
What do you think?
Gary Turner
Advisor to British Army School of Physical Training, World Champion Elite Sportsman
http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/on ... turner.php
Advisor to British Army School of Physical Training, World Champion Elite Sportsman
http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/on ... turner.php
-
Adam Eason
- Posts: 56
- Joined: Wed Aug 07, 2013 9:16 am
Re: Advice on Coping with Stress
Hello Tilley,
Sorry to hear about your ongoing experience.
A couple of recommendations and considerations:
1. It sounds as though you have a busy life. What often happens in the midst of such busy-ness is that we neglect ourselves and our own well-being, or attempts to be well can get easily distracted. Therefore, it is often recommended that you find time to formally and properly relax. I think a lot of people overlook the benefits of simply learning how to relax properly. Avenues to explore for this are the very evidence-based practice of mindfulness (of which a simply body-scan protocol would serve you very well) or a self-hypnosis process. I have actually written an article here on the blog at this website which gives a step-by-step guide on using self-hypnosis for simple relaxation, have a read:
http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/bl ... -hypnosis/
Worrying and stress is often a learned response as Gary has mentioned, and learning to properly relax can interrupt that pattern of worrying.
2. You state in your original post "I have to worry about..."
You don't have to.
I'd consider investigating some means of which you can learn to dispute your thoughts, ideally restructure them, not just refute or dispute them. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) is a very evidence-based process which offers up some means of helping you do this. You might use a simple thought form to chart your thoughts (ones where you tell yourself you 'have to' worry, for example) in writing and the refute them, and then replace them with better, more progressive ones. There are many to be found online, though if you struggle to find any, let me know and I can point out some resources for you.
CBT also shows individuals how to rationalise thoughts and stop catastrophising (when worrying gets out of control unnecessarily) with the use of socratic questioning - looking for logic and evidence for your worries.
In some cases, your GP can refer you to a CBT professional as part of the NHS service.
It is understandable to feel mood swings and fatigued - it is very tiring to worry so much - heck, it would be far easier not to worry, wouldn't it? Be assured that there are resources and answers there for you.
Best wishes to you.
Sorry to hear about your ongoing experience.
A couple of recommendations and considerations:
1. It sounds as though you have a busy life. What often happens in the midst of such busy-ness is that we neglect ourselves and our own well-being, or attempts to be well can get easily distracted. Therefore, it is often recommended that you find time to formally and properly relax. I think a lot of people overlook the benefits of simply learning how to relax properly. Avenues to explore for this are the very evidence-based practice of mindfulness (of which a simply body-scan protocol would serve you very well) or a self-hypnosis process. I have actually written an article here on the blog at this website which gives a step-by-step guide on using self-hypnosis for simple relaxation, have a read:
http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/bl ... -hypnosis/
Worrying and stress is often a learned response as Gary has mentioned, and learning to properly relax can interrupt that pattern of worrying.
2. You state in your original post "I have to worry about..."
You don't have to.
I'd consider investigating some means of which you can learn to dispute your thoughts, ideally restructure them, not just refute or dispute them. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) is a very evidence-based process which offers up some means of helping you do this. You might use a simple thought form to chart your thoughts (ones where you tell yourself you 'have to' worry, for example) in writing and the refute them, and then replace them with better, more progressive ones. There are many to be found online, though if you struggle to find any, let me know and I can point out some resources for you.
CBT also shows individuals how to rationalise thoughts and stop catastrophising (when worrying gets out of control unnecessarily) with the use of socratic questioning - looking for logic and evidence for your worries.
In some cases, your GP can refer you to a CBT professional as part of the NHS service.
It is understandable to feel mood swings and fatigued - it is very tiring to worry so much - heck, it would be far easier not to worry, wouldn't it? Be assured that there are resources and answers there for you.
Best wishes to you.
Adam Eason
Clinical & Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist
http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/on ... _eason.php
Clinical & Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist
http://www.talkhealthpartnership.com/on ... _eason.php
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Wendy Green
- Posts: 159
- Joined: Thu May 24, 2012 11:27 am
Re: Advice on Coping with Stress
Hi Tilley123,
We all need some pressure in our lives - it stimulates and challenges us and gives us something to get out of bed in the morning for. However excessive pressure - i.e. having more pressure placed upon you than you can cope with, leads to stress hormones being released; if the stress continues over a long period of time it leads to chemical changes in the body, which can cause a host of physical and psychological problems ranging from eczema, ibs, migraines/headaches, minor infections such as colds and sore throats etc., anxiety, insomnia and panic attacks to more serious conditions such as high blood pressure, stomach ulcers, heart disease and depression; so clearly your stress is something that you need to tackle as soon as possible.
You've outlined a number of pressures being place on you at the moment and I wonder if there are any that you can eliminate for the moment? You state that you are doing another course alongside your degree - is there any way that you could postpone this for a year - to allow you to focus your energies on completing your degree? This would immediately take away some of the pressure you're feeling at present. Is there anything you can do about your personal problems?
You also say that you 'have to worry about ' your dissertation etc. Worry doesn't really serve any purpose and it triggers the stress response; instead try to identify practical steps you can take to help you complete all of your assignments to the best of your ability and on time. This will help you to feel more confident and in control; I remember panicking when I realised how much work I needed to do in the final year of my degree; what helped me was to create a realistic study timetable. Try it.
Also, try to factor in study breaks where possible. You could also practice deep breathing exercises and simple meditation (see http://www.how-to-meditate.org/) to help you stay calm and focussed. When you're feeling really stressed try reminding yourself that this situation last forever; there is an end in sight, as you are in the final year of your degree. Try to look to the future positively. Perhaps you could even book a holiday for after your degree, to give yourself something to look forward to and as a reward for all of your hard work?
You could also try taking a natural supplement to help you cope, relax and sleep better - such as Kalms - http://www.kalmsstress.com or RelaxHerb - http://www.schwabepharma or Quiet Life - http://www.laneshealth.com
I hope these tips help you and good luck with your studies
Wendy
We all need some pressure in our lives - it stimulates and challenges us and gives us something to get out of bed in the morning for. However excessive pressure - i.e. having more pressure placed upon you than you can cope with, leads to stress hormones being released; if the stress continues over a long period of time it leads to chemical changes in the body, which can cause a host of physical and psychological problems ranging from eczema, ibs, migraines/headaches, minor infections such as colds and sore throats etc., anxiety, insomnia and panic attacks to more serious conditions such as high blood pressure, stomach ulcers, heart disease and depression; so clearly your stress is something that you need to tackle as soon as possible.
You've outlined a number of pressures being place on you at the moment and I wonder if there are any that you can eliminate for the moment? You state that you are doing another course alongside your degree - is there any way that you could postpone this for a year - to allow you to focus your energies on completing your degree? This would immediately take away some of the pressure you're feeling at present. Is there anything you can do about your personal problems?
You also say that you 'have to worry about ' your dissertation etc. Worry doesn't really serve any purpose and it triggers the stress response; instead try to identify practical steps you can take to help you complete all of your assignments to the best of your ability and on time. This will help you to feel more confident and in control; I remember panicking when I realised how much work I needed to do in the final year of my degree; what helped me was to create a realistic study timetable. Try it.
Also, try to factor in study breaks where possible. You could also practice deep breathing exercises and simple meditation (see http://www.how-to-meditate.org/) to help you stay calm and focussed. When you're feeling really stressed try reminding yourself that this situation last forever; there is an end in sight, as you are in the final year of your degree. Try to look to the future positively. Perhaps you could even book a holiday for after your degree, to give yourself something to look forward to and as a reward for all of your hard work?
You could also try taking a natural supplement to help you cope, relax and sleep better - such as Kalms - http://www.kalmsstress.com or RelaxHerb - http://www.schwabepharma or Quiet Life - http://www.laneshealth.com
I hope these tips help you and good luck with your studies
Wendy
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