Shopping/debt addiction
Posted: Mon Dec 09, 2013 1:00 pm
Hi all,
Is it possible to have an addiction to spending money?
I have, over the course of two years, been bailed out of debt four times through spending money excessively. The grand total is over 20 grand - not counting what I have paid back myself. The majority of it has been through credit cards and payday loans.
The main factor seems to be shopping. It can be food or clothes shopping - I seem to have an impulsiveness and lack of control in this area. My parents are away of this, and we have struggled as a family. I have got a lot better but I'm fearful I still have many of the same compulsions. I am in debt again, around £1,000, which to me doesn't seem much anymore. That's what worries me.
I am going away next year and hope to have a clean break. But I will be independent totally for the first time in my life, having to work and manage my money all by myself. I'm terrified of repeating the same steps and ending up in a foreign country with no money and calling my parents for help yet again. I feel I can't do it to them anymore and want to step out of this pattern.
The pattern seems to be when feeling low I spend money. I seem incapable of budgeting effectively, despite how strongly I may convince myself "it will work this time". I have become a compulsive liar because of this and it has destroyed not only relationships with parents but with a few friends too. It played a huge role in the break up between myself and my boyfriend. Not only has it led to having a busting full wardrobe of clothes I don't even want, it's led to an increase in weight - and all of this makes me feel worse and makes me want to repeat the pattern. Clothes sopping has definitely decreased over the last couple of months and I have managed to buy all presents for Christmas with only one (needed) thing for myself. But I still have managed to get myself into debt through buying food and silly pointless little things.
Basically, I was wondering if there is a sort of list or steps I could follow to help me fall out of this pattern. As I'm going away, I don't have time/can't afford 'proper' help. But if there's any way you could help it would be much appreciated. I've read some of the other threads, and see many encourage other patterns such as exercise. I did try exercise but a main problem seems to be my rock bottom self esteem. I also have a LTC, which leads to quite extreme fatigue at times. Sometimes I will lie in bed on my computer buying pointless things.
Thank you for your help.
Is it possible to have an addiction to spending money?
I have, over the course of two years, been bailed out of debt four times through spending money excessively. The grand total is over 20 grand - not counting what I have paid back myself. The majority of it has been through credit cards and payday loans.
The main factor seems to be shopping. It can be food or clothes shopping - I seem to have an impulsiveness and lack of control in this area. My parents are away of this, and we have struggled as a family. I have got a lot better but I'm fearful I still have many of the same compulsions. I am in debt again, around £1,000, which to me doesn't seem much anymore. That's what worries me.
I am going away next year and hope to have a clean break. But I will be independent totally for the first time in my life, having to work and manage my money all by myself. I'm terrified of repeating the same steps and ending up in a foreign country with no money and calling my parents for help yet again. I feel I can't do it to them anymore and want to step out of this pattern.
The pattern seems to be when feeling low I spend money. I seem incapable of budgeting effectively, despite how strongly I may convince myself "it will work this time". I have become a compulsive liar because of this and it has destroyed not only relationships with parents but with a few friends too. It played a huge role in the break up between myself and my boyfriend. Not only has it led to having a busting full wardrobe of clothes I don't even want, it's led to an increase in weight - and all of this makes me feel worse and makes me want to repeat the pattern. Clothes sopping has definitely decreased over the last couple of months and I have managed to buy all presents for Christmas with only one (needed) thing for myself. But I still have managed to get myself into debt through buying food and silly pointless little things.
Basically, I was wondering if there is a sort of list or steps I could follow to help me fall out of this pattern. As I'm going away, I don't have time/can't afford 'proper' help. But if there's any way you could help it would be much appreciated. I've read some of the other threads, and see many encourage other patterns such as exercise. I did try exercise but a main problem seems to be my rock bottom self esteem. I also have a LTC, which leads to quite extreme fatigue at times. Sometimes I will lie in bed on my computer buying pointless things.
Thank you for your help.