I can't deal with attacking my skin anymore

[Ihatelife]

I quickly googled this because I needed to rant or talk to someone about my eczema
.. It's severe in my case, but it's the worst it's been in a few years. It has now flared up on my neck, face, shoulders, back of neck, legs, thighs, lower back, shoulder blades... I look terrible. I feel disgusting like everyone is better than me. It's genuinely making me feel suicidal.

I've tried so hard to like myself, but I am repulsed by myself. It's come to the point where I bathe and shower in the dark. I'm sick of the constant itch, the maddening feeling, the pain, how sore it is, picking at myself and destroying myself. I'm sick of being disgusting. I'm sick of wasting my life indoors because I don't have the self esteem to leave the house or live my life anymore. I despise everything and it's all because of my skin! Why me?! My other siblings have mild eczema, some don't even have it! Why must I have awful mental health issues and eczema that flares up because of stress?!

[talkhealth]

Really sorry to read your post... however you are absolutely not alone with how you feel about your skin condition as you can read many others here who have felt similar and their thoughts on how best they manage it. We would suggest that you do keep going back to your GP to firstly help you manage the physical symptoms of the condition but also they can help with the psychological issues that you describe. Please do view our video on the psychological impact of having a skin condition with one of our experts Dr Andrew Thompson. It does refer to the skin condition rosacea, but the sentiments and advice given are exactly the same for people that struggle with any skin condition. I do hope this help. Plus read our members stories here and one of the many articles we have on talkeczema.

[Anna_123]

I’m so sorry to hear what a difficult time you’re having at the moment. I’ve been there and it’s really really tough, but you will get through it, your skin will improve and your mood and emotions with it.

I’m currently recovering from what has been the worst flare up of my adult life. My skin got infected last July and after numerous courses of antibiotics, oral steroids and constant care and attention my skin is just about back to normal now (eczema normal, not normal normal, but it’s managable).

I felt down and hopeless, my skin would start to show signs of improvement then just get really really bad again. I felt like it was completely outside of my control and no matter what I did it wasn’t helping. But I am starting to feel more like myself again now.

It’s a horrible cycle because the eczema makes you feel down and stressed and then the stress can make your eczema worse. You don’t feel like you want to look after yourself, because what’s the point and it doesn’t make any difference anyway. But it’s really important that you do look after yourself.

Please persevere and things will improve x