Syphilis worry

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rangefinder
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Joined: Mon Dec 04, 2023 2:52 pm
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by rangefinder on Mon Dec 04, 2023 2:57 pm

Syphilis worry

Hi. I was wondering if anyone can help or has any advice. Am i worrying unnecessarily?
I am a married man in the UK. Back in May this year I got drunk at a work do and did something stupid. For one night i got involved with a swinger who i had known for a while. she attends sex parties and does sex protected but oral without. She also has oral with women.
We did a lot of french kissing with tongues. She performed oral on me for about 10 seconds and i performed brief oral on her for about 45 seconds and analingus for anout ten seconds. I didnt notice any sores but then again i was drunk and not looking. Nothing more was done and i stopped it. Afterwards she mentioned in general conversation she had a sore throat.
A few days later i ordered an sti kit and did tests for gonorrhea, chlamidya, hiv and syphilis. i did the tests at the ten day mark.The whole episode was hugely stressing me out!
A day or two before my mouth got sore (8-10 days post exposure). On the sides like id been chewing it and also on the very tip of my tongue and also my throat was sore. This disappeared after a couple of weeks the fact i kept gargling with tcp probably didnt help. I couldnt see any real or obvious sores or lesions. couldnt see anything on the tip. Anyway a month or so later my wife complains of a sore mouth puts it down to being tired and run down and also a cold aore developson her lip and clears within a few days. I an now convinced i have contracted oral syphilis from this woman and passed it on to my wife and its causing me so much stress and anxiety.
I have had no symptoms since so no secondary symptoms, no rash no further lesions etc. I also did some research and on the UK in 2022 there were 2.2m sti screens done. Of that there were 8700 positive syphilis cases (0.04% of the screens) Of that 8700 69% were in MSM so men who have sex with men. This leaves approx 2700. I found a study saying only 14 % of primary syphilis cases present orally. 14% of 2697 = 378 ( If i was to have syphilis i am a hetro male and only presenting orally) So to summarise 378 of 2.2m is the most miniscule percentage it wont even show on a calculator as it is a small fraction
of 1%. I guess im asking the forum if my logic on associated risk is correct? And does this even sound like syphilis in the first place? I think the anxiety and guilt is probably playing a major part in this . Thanks so much for any responses. All my tests were negative at the ten day mark by the way.