talkhealth Blog

“Live more, complain less. More smiles, less stress. Less hate, more blessed”- Anon.

Have I hit a raw nerve? I hope not however when I read this I thought to myself that my trait like many others out there is to whinge.

Now before some of you get on your high horse questioning why I’ve chosen this quote today well it’s because it’s so true. On a personal level whether it be my condition or just life in general having a bit whinge is something that we’re all prone to doing and you know what I’m bloody sick of whinging.

A few questions for you all.

What makes you whinge?

What’s the one gripe that you have that you cannot quite shake off?

What’s the one thing that well and truly pisses you off to where you go on a full blown power rant knowing fine well that nothing will change?

Whatever answer you’ve given that’s fine, that’s normal because we wouldn’t be who we are if we didn’t have a bit whinge every now and again however to whinge repeatedly. Well.. I’ll let you finish that sentence.

In the oxford dictionary the definition of the word whinge is to complain persistently and in a peevish or irritating way. Funnily enough the example they’ve used to define this word is to “Stop whinging and get on with it” and as I read it I cannot help but chuckle to myself as this is the way my parents told me to crack on in times of trouble.

Now I’m not going to turn all parental on you and say “Just bloody get on with it” however there is some element of truth and honesty in that remark.

If you think long and hard about it our parents, grandparents and beyond probably had different worries but you know what? In their day there wasn’t anything to turn to like the internet or some of the remarkably resourceful material we have nowadays. Then it was just get on with it, crack on and hope for the best.

People used to talk, communication was vital in order to solve issues and in today’s society that doesn’t always happen because people are glued to the internet, their mobile phones or some technological device that is so complex that when people talk about this sort of shit I just nod and smile because I haven’t got the foggiest what they’re on about.

Getting back to the quote as you should all be aware of my background by now (and if you don’t earlier posts will confirm the following) that I have been renowned for being a bit a worrier however after addressing issues over the past few years I’m coming to terms with the fact that I’m approaching 29 years of age, I have a condition that I cannot control and that’s there’s bound to be a fair few bumps in the road we’d call life.

It’s safe to say there’s many aspects of people’s lives they’d like to change such as removing their condition from their life, losing weight, earning more cash, challenging themselves more often and the list goes on however as I’m getting older I’m realising that being in constant battle with yourself can only result in three things. Torment, aggravation and never being truly satisfied with who you are hence the whinging!

One thing I was told by my granddad before he passed away. There’s no point in doing battle with yourself because you’ll never win.

Since blogging last I’ve browsed my twitter timeline, read a fair few articles and looked at my Epilepsy diary to see if there’s anything that I can change or whether I will remain in constant battle with oneself.

With me I’m understanding that my shakes are something that I may never grow out of and that constantly analysing my thought activity has in the past caused me more harm than good; in fact I’m not going to lie it can make you more miserable. It did with me.

If you think long and hard about it my thinking has resulted in me writing Sazzle’s blog so maybe I should retract that statement! Ha! No I’m only joking analysing at times can be to your own detriment.

You’ve probably all heard of the expression “Go with the flow” well that’s on thing I can hold my hands up high and say that I’ve not always done. Not necessarily now as I’ve managed to embrace who I am but for years my condition was a large part of my life that I couldn’t just accept. I didn’t want to accept it I just wanted to eliminate it entirely and classify it as a dream that I’d just so happened to be a part of for twenty years.

For those who aren’t aware at 8 years old I was diagnosed with Epilepsy suffering grande mal seizures and have been on medication on and off for over 17 years in that timescale. Hell I’m still on them now.

In January 2009 was to be the last seizure I had on record and ever since there’s been that part of me wondering when the seizures will return as they have done in the past.

I could sit here and say that this uncertainty could be on the contributory factors to my concerns however I’ve been down this road before in my teens when my seizures remained dormant only this time I have age and experience on my side. It’s a thought cycle that has taken years (yes you read that rightly) years to accept.

I could sit here and blame my condition (as I have done in the past) for being the main contributory factor as to why I whinge and as to why I don’t appreciate life to it’s fullest however to a degree that would be a lie. It’s been something that has worried me but could have been prevented if I knew how to handle it sooner.

Epilepsy has been a struggle and a word that is so powerful to anyone involved in the Epilepsy community it’s hard to comprehend. Anyone reading this will hopefully understand where I’m coming from. It’s not just a word it means something.

Epilepsy is a condition that over 65 million people cope with on a daily basis to which the majority have no tell tale signs as to why and how Epilepsy has entered their life.

To many suffering with the condition that number doesn’t come into the equation because when an episode hits it’s either you or the loved ones around you that are suffering therefore why do we need to concern ourselves with everyone else? We do because we are all going through a similar experience.

Many may disagree with that last statements read however it was only when I started writing Sazzle’s blog that was when I looked at Epilepsy properly as a whole and started to see what others went through. I would whinge and think why me; Selfish as that may come across it was true.

Now I see Epilepsy for what it is not solely for what it’s doing to me therefore is whinging going to get me anywhere? Absolutely not. All that person knows is that Epilepsy will remain in their life until informed otherwise therefore to find that illusive strength to continue living their lives is something that takes guts, determination and endless positivity. Never let anyone tell you differently.

As I take into account today’s quote I wonder if we all stopped whinging would the world be a better place? Is there any right or wrong way when it comes to moaning and prattling on?

All I know is that as I get older there’s certain things in my life I cannot prevent, there’s certain scenario’s in my life I cannot alter as that was my past however what is certain is that I can determine what satisfaction I want life to offer as do you.

Yes we’re all bound to be hit by problems whether they be health related or not however it’s the way we handle things that makes you stronger. You don’t have to take anything lying down.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again surround yourself with people that make you smile, people who make you whinge less, people that inspire you and instead of criticising you have the opportunity to stand by you cheering you on along the way because they want to not because they feel they have to.

As for the remainder of my week.

Easter holidays, spending time with family, day trips with the other half, some chocolate, exercise and making salad jars. That pretty much sums the past ten days in a nutshell. Exercise wise I’m seeing a subtle change and it’s making me want to push myself more. As for the chocolate well… we’ve been down this road numerous times before haven’t we?

It’s safe to say chocolate and I will remain life long friends and that like Epilepsy I don’t think it’ll be leaving my life in a hurry. Everything in moderation I say.

The bank balance well do we need to go there? I’m counting down to my birthday so I can get some clothes and prepare for Paris. The countdown is officially on.

To conclude today’s post. I’m not going to summarise today’s post because I think I’ve talked enough already however I will leave you with a final quote. It may pose relevance and if you don’t have a garden where you live then look beneath the meaning. It may make sense when you read it.

“Today I can complain because the weather is rainy or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free”- Anon.

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Saz

Overcoming worry, anxiety and learning to cope with epilepsy. I dedicate this blog to my family and to all those people out there who thought the possible was impossible. Life isn’t about doing everything yesterday it’s about finding acceptance and taking your time. This blog has been created to document my findings and to allow others to understand that they are not alone. I have tried my best to collate these concerns for others to read should they wish. The intention is to not only address my concerns of my condition however I also intend to address my daily struggles whilst giving an insight as to what my days entail.